I have news about something free! Our unanimously-agreed-upon National Treasure™ Sir David Attenborough has taken over the giant wraparound screens at Outernet until 31 May. The experience is called Our Story with David Attenborough, and it’s a newly created shorter version of the Natural History Museum’s full immersive show of the same name. Using scientifically accurate animation and real footage from around the world, Sir David guides you through the story of humanity’s relationship with the planet – before showing a possible near-future version of London where nature and people manage to flourish together. As with all Outernet giant-screen extravaganzas, it looks spectacular and is completely free to visit. We went a few days ago and thought it was great, although much shorter than expected: just a few minutes’ long. There’ll be regular showings throughout the day, and you can check the website for exact times. There’s much more you can do this weekend, of course – some of them free, some of them less so. Check them out and see what takes your fancy. Enjoy! Jeff xx 1: Visit London’s newest temple to upside-down rooms and forced-perspective photosMuseum of Illusions 📍 Where: Museum of Illusions, 15–17 Tottenham Court Road, W1T 1BJ  “You know what this city needs?” said absolutely no one. “Another museum of illusions.” Yet someone unhinged must have said those words out loud, because our capital city now has its third museum of illusions in less than four years. Either there’s an insatiable demand for rooms where your child appears upside down, or illusion museums are the latest way to launder money now that American sweet shops have been found out. The newest one is Museum of Illusions on Tottenham Court Road, and it competes directly with Paradox Museum in Knightsbridge and Twist Museum on Oxford Street. At the time of writing, the one in London has only just opened – so I haven’t been and I haven’t seen any reviews. But Museum of Illusions is an international brand with 60 locations across 27 countries and 5 continents, and people seem to love its other venues. Mancunians give their version 4.7 stars, Romans 4.4, New Yorkers 4.4 as well, and Nairobians love it as much as the Mancs (4.7). Most incredibly, the Museum of Illusions Las Vegas – in a city built almost entirely on spectacle and illusion – gets 4.8 stars from nearly 9,000 people. If you’ve been to Paradox Museum or Twist Museum and you’re wondering if this one is different in any way at all… I can’t say for certain, but I’m pretty sure the answer is “ish, but not in any meaningful way”. Paradox leans more heavily into the whole Instagram-photo-op side of things, Twist likes to be a bit more educational with its little explanation signs, and – from what I’ve read – Museum of Illusions has plonked itself in the middle of this very narrow spectrum. Inside you’ll find all the things you think you’ll find: a “Beuchet Chair room” where someone sits on a chair and appears to be tiny; a “head on a platter” installation where it looks like your head has no body; a “symmetry room” where everything gets cloned; that famous “cafe wall illusion” where you think the lines are bendy but actually they’re straight; and so on. So yes, if that sounds fun to you, go. I’m just not convinced it matters which of the three you choose – especially as the prices are all similarly ambitious. (Paradox and Twist lose points, however, for making theirs look cheaper and having sneaky booking fees in a smaller font.) Here’s a breakdown with all fees included:
Twist does get a slightly higher rating on Google, but then it’s from a smaller number of people. So yes, go to whichever one’s closest to you. And unless you’re a genuine optical-illusion anorak, you probably don’t need to collect the full set. Find out more: https://moilondon.uk/experience/ 2: Trust a famously reliable theatre company to turn farm chaos into goldYoung MacDonald Wants a Farm 📍 Where: artsdepot, 5 Nether Street, Tally Ho Corner, N12 0GA  Our six-month-old vacuum cleaner collapsed and died the other day. It had been missing a handle since its three-week birthday, and had never once done anything useful on carpet – despite its manufacturer’s claims to the contrary. So I’ve been looking into replacements. And everyone on Reddit, including this vacuum expert (who is a LEGEND and you need to read his famous AMA) says Miele is the brand to go for. Apparently, every single vacuum cleaner the company produces is stellar, so I can trust that whatever I buy from the brand: it’ll last forever and I’ll be eternally happy. And now I think I’ve found the Miele of children’s stage shows. Little Seeds Music has created hit after hit of clever, creative, offbeat family theatre. You might have heard of some of them: Luna Loves Library Day, Cinderella Ice Cream Seller, A Present For Jack, and David Gibb’s Family Jukebox are all Little Seeds creations that have been adored by both me and people who know what they’re talking about. As with some of their other productions, Young MacDonald Wants a Farm is essentially a “what happened next?” version of an old story – in this case the story of Old MacDonald who had a farm. It’s about Young MacDonald who’s been left in charge of his dad’s farm and soon realises that it’s less easy to manage than he thought. There’s plenty of silliness, lots of catchy original songs, and the odd bit of audience interaction where children are invited to help bring order back to the farm. I haven’t been, but like I said: this is the Miele of theatre, which means it’s guaranteed to be fantastic. The only difference with Miele (other than, I don’t know, practically everything else) is that it won’t cost you OH MY GOODNESS EIGHT. HUNDRED. POUNDS to experience the joy of it. 👉 Brief interruption in a horrible colour: if this newsletter has earned its keep, you can buy me a coffee. (Completely optional, of course.)3: Smuggle Mozart, Britten and Elgar into your child’s brain via talking animalsFUNharmonics: Stan and Mabel and the Race for Space 📍 Where: Southbank Centre, Belvedere Road, SE1 8XX  Stan and Mabel and the Race for Space is the performance equivalent of hiding vegetables in chocolate cake: it’s a London Philharmonic Orchestra concert disguised as a story about a music-loving dog called Stan and his feline companion Mabel, who have been captured and thrown into the School for Wild and Dangerous Animals. Stan, Mabel and all their animal friends then make a run for it and try to find a safe place to call home – picking up a working knowledge of orchestra music along the way. It may not be the most true-to-life tale on earth, but just go with it: it’s fun, educational and interactive, with players introducing their instruments and leading singalongs. And it comes with a full orchestra playing Mozart, Elgar and Britten among others. Find out more: https://www.southbankcentre.co.uk/whats-on/funharmonics-stan-and-mabel-and-the-race-for-space/
4: Dive into a surprisingly thoughtful festival about boys, identity and belongingFestival of The Boy London 📍 Where: Big Penny Social, 1 Priestley Way, E17 6AL  Before you say it, don’t worry: there was a Festival of The Girl too, and there’ll be another one in October. And before you say it, don’t worry: girls can also attend the Festival of The Boy. Allegations of unfairness dealt with, let’s look into this thing. The Festival of The Boy is a festival with strange ideas about how to capitalise its name but a solid mission statement and reason for existence. It came about due to a report called The Voice of the Boys (no UC “the” this time?), which was based on conversations with over 1,000 boys aged 11–16 across the UK. It found that 81% of boys say there aren’t enough opportunities to just be a boy in today’s world. It also found that 79% are confused about what “masculinity” means; that 72% feel socially disconnected, saying they don’t have more than one person who knows them really well; and that 65% don’t think school is preparing them for the future well enough. If you’re starting to worry that the festival will feature Andrew Tate-esque role models who teach boys not to cry and how to beat each other up more successfully, that’s really not what it is. It’s about giving boys space to connect, explore interests and feel more comfortable in themselves, rather than forcing them into one narrow idea of masculinity. The programme has the energy of someone emptying an entire parenting philosophy onto a timetable, but that’s not a bad thing. You can try stage combat and street dance, learn about aviation with British Airways, do STEM activities with UCL, discuss body image, explore equality at home, and rethink what “strength” actually means with trainers and strongman coaches. There are also art workshops, gaming, yoga, music, Dungeons & Dragons-style storytelling adventures and a nanny/DJ called Joss, which feels like the sort of job title only London could produce. Whether or not you agree with every aspect of the festival’s philosophy, it’s difficult to argue with a timetable that encourages boys to express themselves through art, music, science and stage combat. I mean, it’s considerably healthier than whatever the internet has planned for them that day – and probably safer than body-slamming each other onto an IKEA rug. Find out more: https://www.universe.com/events/festival-of-the-boy-london-tickets-30L2BD 5: Watch children battle for survival in the deadliest garden in cinema historyHoney, I Shrunk The Kids 📍 Where: The Garden Cinema, 39-41 Parker Street, WC2B 5PQ  Today I learned that the Society for the Preservation of English Language and Literature (S.P.E.L.L) is/was a thing (it doesn’t seem to have been active for some time). And in 1989 it gave Honey, I Shrunk The Kids a Dunce Cap Award, citing the title’s grammatical error of using “shrunk” instead of “shrank”. (If S.P.E.L.L had still been operating in 2002, I hope they would have given the same award to Two Weeks Notice.) The grammatical error isn’t the film’s only problem. There’s also a very obvious building that’s been painted blue to stand in for the sky, reflections of set lighting and cameras visible on characters’ glasses throughout the film, and a character who can be heard breathing despite having just nearly drowned. But that doesn’t take away from the fact that this film, beloved by surprisingly few ordinary people and a surprisingly large number of professional critics, is a classic. And your kids need to see it because it’s as important to the childhood experience as trying to get a straw into a Capri-Sun and putting on socks straight after swimming. In case you’re an alien who’s visiting Earth for the first time, 1) Welcome! 2) Here’s a brief explanation of the plot: a man invents a machine that shrinks objects, accidentally uses it on several children, and is then forced to rescue them from what has suddenly become the deadliest garden in America. And while you can watch it at home, there’s nothing like the full cinema experience – especially when it’s at The Garden Cinema, which is a beautiful art deco-style, truly independent place with classy drinks, proper good coffee, and the kinds of hipster snacks you feel better about buying than Haribo. Tickets are likely to sell out fast, so hurry up and book. Find out more: https://www.thegardencinema.co.uk/film/honey-i-shrunk-the-kids/
Other listingsThis section now brings together both new events I don’t have room to expand on and selected older ones from past newsletters that are still running. If you see a “(see my write-up here)”, that’s your cue to click through and rediscover whatever Past Me felt strongly enough to write about. Rooftop Cinema Club: Ratatouille📍 Where: Level 8 Stratford Shopping Centre, Great Eastern Road, E15 1XE The Rapping Princess📍 Where: Polka Theatre, 240 The Broadway, SW19 1SB Goose Green Fair at Dulwich Festival📍 Where: Goose Green, East Dulwich, SE22 9AU The Flying Bath📍 Where: Little Angel Theatre, 14 Dagmar Passage, N1 2DN Toto the Ninja Cat and the Great Snake Escape📍 Where: Little Angel Studios, Sebbon Street, N1 2EH Pie-Rat Island📍 Where: Half Moon Young People’s Theatre, 43 White Horse Road, E1 0ND Vauxhall May Fair📍 Where: Vauxhall City Farm (Tyers Street, SE11 5HS) and Vauxhall Pleasure Gardens, SE11 5HL Family Film Club: The Songbird's Secret📍 Where: Barbican Centre, Silk Street, EC2Y 8DS The Ugly Duckling📍 Where: Puppet Theatre Barge, Blomfield Road (opposite 35), W9 2PF Toto Kerblammo! (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Unicorn Theatre, 147 Tooley Street, SE1 2HZ Skate 50 (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Southbank Centre, Belvedere Road, SE1 8XX Zurbarán (see my write-up here)📍 Where: The National Gallery, Trafalgar Square, WC2N 5DN NIGO: From Japan with Love📍 Where: Design Museum, 224–238 Kensington High Street, W8 6AG Tortoise and the Hare📍 Where: Polka Theatre, 240 The Broadway, SW19 1SB Paulo Nimer Pjota: Encantados📍 Where: South London Gallery, 65–67 Peckham Road, SE5 8UH David Bowie: You're Not Alone (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Lightroom, 12 Lewis Cubitt Square, N1C 4DY Early Netherlandish drawings (see my write-up here)📍 Where: British Museum, Great Russell Street, WC1B 3DG Paint! Pattern! Print! The Textiles of Susan Collier and Sarah Campbell (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Fashion and Textile Museum, 83 Bermondsey Street, SE1 3XF The Wallace Collection at War📍 Where: The Wallace Collection, Hertford House, Manchester Square, W1U 3BN Konrad Mägi📍 Where: Dulwich Picture Gallery, College Road, SE21 7AD Ty Locke: Hand Me Downs (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Copperfield Gallery, 6 Copperfield Street, SE1 0EP The Coming of Age📍 Where: Wellcome Collection, 183 Euston Road, NW1 2BE The Last Princess of Punjab📍 Where: Kensington Palace, Kensington Gardens, W8 4PX Mundo Pixar Experience (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Fulton Road, Wembley, HA9 0TF Fairy Tales (see my write-up here)📍 Where: The British Library, 96 Euston Road, NW1 2DB Seurat and the Sea📍 Where: Courtauld Gallery, Somerset House, Strand, WC2R 0RN Cleopatra: The Experience (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Immerse LDN, Excel Waterfront, ExCel, E16 1XL Beauty and Destruction: Wartime London in Art (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Imperial War Museum, Lambeth Road, SE1 6HZ David Hockney: A Year in Normandie and Some Other Thoughts about Painting (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Serpentine North, West Carriage Drive, W2 2AR Inside Aardman: Wallace & Gromit and Friends (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Young V&A, Cambridge Heath Road, E2 9PA Ramses and the Pharaohs' Gold: The Exhibition (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Battersea Power Station, 2 Circus Road East, SW11 8DQ Voyage to the Deep – Underwater Adventures📍 Where: Horniman Museum & Gardens, 100 London Road, SE23 3PQ Octonauts: Adventure at the Horniman📍 Where: Horniman Museum & Gardens, 100 London Road, SE23 3PQ Tracey Emin: A Second Life (see my write-up here)📍 Where: Tate Modern, Bankside, SE1 9TG Queen Elizabeth II: Her Life in Style (see my write-up here)📍 Where: The King’s Gallery, Buckingham Palace, SW1A 1AA |
🛹 40 things to do in London this weekend with the kids (16–17 May)
May 13, 2026
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12 min read
