Hey DILFs,

If you’re still clinging to your New Year health goals – despite January doing everything it can to drag you into half-price cocktails and suspiciously generous pizza deals – then fair play. Willpower is in short supply right now.

At the same time, it would be nice to have something to show for all this restraint. Ideally something that proves you have, in fact, saved money – and ideally something your children can make the most of too. On that front, I bring good news.

First up, Hampton Court Palace is having a New Year sale: all online tickets are 50% off for visits up to 6 February. Given that a normal adult ticket costs £30.90 and a child is £15.50, you could reasonably argue that full price is an absolute liberty. But rather than dwell on that, let’s declare it a win for family days out instead.

There’s also 20% off Brigit’s Bakery Afternoon Tea Bus Tours, across any date, time or theme – just use code BONUS20 at checkout. Admittedly, the menu may not sit comfortably alongside your new commitment to healthier living, but you still get the fun of the theme, a tour of London, and the joy of your children watching scones arrive on a moving vehicle.

And finally, if you’ve ever looked at Thames Rockets and thought “that looks fun but absolutely not at that price” (rather than, say, “that looks cold and terrifying”), they’re running a January sale. Buy a cash voucher for any ride and the value will be automatically topped up: £25 becomes £50, £50 becomes £115, £100 becomes £225 and £200 becomes £450. To get the offer, click through and hit the “buy more get more” banner just below the heading.

So: you can avoid the cocktails, skip the pizza deals, and still come away with a few very visible, very defensible wins.

Enjoy!

Jeff xx

PS I normally write in-depth reviews/descriptions of at least five events – followed by a list of everything else. This week I’m afraid there are only four events. I wrote five, but one of them was cancelled at the last minute. Sorry about that!

Saturday Sessions: The Art of Doodling
Saturday 24 January, 13:30
Southbank Centre, Belvedere Road, SE1 8XX
Free – no ticket required
Age guidance: 5–11

The artist Erdem Kuslu is that deeply irritating type of person who has good looks, great hair and annoyingly impressive artistic skills. Oh yes, and a background in computer science too – meaning that if the whole art thing ever falls apart, he can presumably stroll into a tech job on his natural charisma and emerge clutching some egregious stock options. I’d love to hate him in my shallow, self-centred way, but I can’t, because he seems really nice. Damn him.

He won’t be using his computer science skills at this Saturday Session – nor, for that matter, his background in sociology (yes, there’s that too). Instead, he’ll be diving into the world of doodling – showing how some simple scribbles and modest, meaningless marks can turn into something far more interesting with a bit of guidance and imagination.

This isn’t the kind of doodling that involves drawing 3D boxes or repeatedly writing your own name during a meeting that should have been an email. Kuslu’s work uses detailed cluster drawings to “explore the complexity of everyday life” – a description that sounds faintly art-school-wanky, but makes much more sense once you’ve actually seen his work.

At the session, you’ll be introduced to more of Kuslu’s drawings for inspiration, admiration, and a rising, corrosive envy as you realise how much visual interest he can wring out of things you walked past this morning without noticing. Then it’s on to drawing exercises and group games, before you and your family start doodling in earnest.

At the very least, you’ll leave knowing that while some people have looks, brains and talent, they also choose to spend their Saturdays teaching children how to draw. Which really undercuts the mild resentment you’d (OK, I’d) been nursing.

Find out more: https://www.southbankcentre.co.uk/whats-on/saturday-sessions-the-art-of-doodling/

Jack and the Beanstalk (sort of)
Sunday 25 January, 11:00 and 14:00
Jacksons Lane Arts Centre, 269a Archway Road, N6 5AA
£14 per person
Age guidance: 3–10

Sometimes, writing this newsletter involves translating pretentious and stuffy event descriptions into something that vaguely resembles plain English. This isn’t one of those times. In fact, it’s almost the opposite: it’s so cool, chaotic and blasé that I’m struggling to make head or tale of it for that reason instead.

Apparently, this show is “Jack and the Beanstalk like it’s been thrown in a blender with a drum machine and dodgy celebrity lookalikes. Part air guitar workshop, part magical mess, this lo-fi, hi-tech, big-beat bonkers show is stuffed with songs, silliness and surprise grannies.” I’m none the wiser about the actual storyline, and I strongly suspect the people who wrote this aren’t either. There’s also a chance no one gave it the once-over before hitting publish: “Lo-fi and high-tech” reads like two different drafts made it into the final version.

“Bring your kids,” it says. I can definitely do that. They enjoy shouting, music, and anything described as “bonkers”: they will almost certainly have a great time. “Bring yer nan,” it also suggests. No. If she weren’t already dead, this is not something I’d knowingly inflict on her delicate nerves and fragile cardiovascular system.

Marketing exuberance aside, the reviews are excellent, and I should probably accept that this description is less about explanation and more about distraction. We all know how Jack and the Beanstalk is meant to go, and this version clearly isn’t sticking to the script – so perhaps the adjective pile-up is a deliberate attempt to avoid giving away whatever strange turns it takes along the way. And in that case, fine. I’ll allow it. (And you probably should too.)

Find out more: https://www.jacksonslane.org.uk/events/jack-and-the-beanstalk-sort-of/

👍️ You’re so close to Kenwood House – a place which, if you’re me, you’ve been meaning to revisit for years but haven’t managed to do so. There’s so much to do there – including a fun family trail – and the cafe is lovely.

👍️ If you fancy a heartier meal than Kenwood’s carrot cake, head to the famous Spaniards Inn (no apostrophe). It’s one of London’s oldest pubs and has been associated with Charles Dickens and John Keats, as most old pubs eventually are. Inside it’s all dark wood, low ceilings and open fires; outside, there’s a big beer garden that’s particularly welcome after a walk on Hampstead Heath.

Sherlock Jr + Cops (U): Silent Film & Live Music
Sunday 25 January, 13:00 and 15:00
Barbican Centre, Silk Street, EC2Y 8DS
£15.50 per person
Age guidance: rated “U”

DILF Club members were told about this event aaaages ago – before it was down to the final few tickets! Want to become a member? It’s just £3 a month and full of goodies. Find out more here.

I decided to look up whether silent films are ever actually silent – mainly to work out whether they could survive contact with children – and happily, I discovered that silent films were always designed to be shown with music.

It’s perfect: nothing important is being said at any moment, which means kids can chew, whisper, wriggle and occasionally provide their own commentary without anyone missing major plot points. This may not be an ideal cinematic environment in general, but it does mean everyone still understands what’s going on – and in this case, the audience is very much made up of people in the same boat anyway.

At this screening, you’ll see two Buster Keaton films – Sherlock Jr. and Cops – both shown with a live piano score by John Sweeney. Live, as in: a real person, at an actual piano, doing the music in real time. The same experience at the Royal Albert Hall does admittedly come with a full orchestra, but it would also set you back somewhere north of £130.

And frankly, the films at the Barbican are much more fun. Sherlock Jr. (1 hour) follows a cinema projectionist who falls asleep at work, dreams himself into the film he’s showing, and attempts to solve a crime while the film itself keeps rearranging reality around him. Doors appear and disappear, scenes jump without warning, and physics generally gives up early on.

That’s followed by Cops (20 minutes), which begins with Keaton accidentally being mistaken for a bomb-throwing anarchist and escalates rapidly into him being chased by what appears to be the entire police force. It’s relentless and ridiculous, and kids will absolutely love it.

The music runs throughout, filling the room and smoothing over popcorn crunching, chatter and disagreements about armrests. Which means you get the pleasure of introducing your children to brilliant classic films, while also not having to hiss “shhh” every 30 seconds and feeling like a joyless ghoul.

Find out more: https://www.barbican.org.uk/whats-on/2026/event/silent-film-live-music-sherlock-jr-cops

👍️ It’s the final day to catch Dirty Looks: Desire and Decay in Fashion at the Barbican. See my write-up here.

Jolly Djembe African Drumming
Saturday 24 January, 11:00
Riverside Studios, 101 Queen Caroline Street, W6 9BN
Adults £17, children £14

I’ve just gone down a drum-shaped rabbit hole and emerged with a head full of facts about the djembe (pronounced jem-bay) – a drum that’s been played by West Africans since the 12th century, accompanying dances at weddings, births, funerals and other important life moments. You’ll recognise the sound immediately:

One source describes the djembe as “a great drum for playing outdoors, but almost painfully loud indoors” – which feels like useful information given that this is very much an indoor workshop. Consider this your polite suggestion to bring earplugs.

The immense volume does at least come with range. Thanks to its goblet shape, traditionally carved from a single tree trunk, the djembe can produce three distinct sounds – bass (low), tone (medium) and slap (high) – depending on where and how you strike the skin with your hands.

And yes: the skin is a real skin. Goat skin (or sometimes calf), in case you’re wondering. Its relative thinness produces a brighter and snappier “slap” sound than, say, cowhide – which is too thick to manage the higher pitches. Goat skin is also easier for little hands to work with – but it might be best not to inform them that they’ll be whacking a dead goat, or indeed why.

And at this workshop, there’ll indeed be a fair amount of whacking. Kids will learn about the rhythms of Africa, learn the art of djembe drumming, learn songs and discover new beats. There’s also an interactive storytelling session at the end about endangered mangoes – a nice idea, but good luck corralling a bunch of children who’ve just been handed drums and shown exactly how to use them.

Find out more: https://riversidestudios.co.uk/whats-on/9a-the-jolly-djembe-club/

This section now brings together both new events I don’t have room to expand on and selected older ones from past newsletters that are still running. If you see a “(see my write-up here)”, that’s your cue to click through and rediscover whatever Past Me felt strongly enough to write about.

GRAND SUMO highlights at Japan House London
Until 25 January, 16:30–17:30
Japan House, 101–111 Kensington High Street, W8 5SA
FREE

Ryoji Ikeda: Data-Cosm
Until 1 February, various timeslots
180 Studios, 6 Surrey Street, WC2R 2ND
Adults £12, under-12s free

Little Red Riding Hood (interactive play space)
Until 22 February (drop in during any time during your visit)
Discover Children’s Story Centre, 383–387 High Street, E15 4QZ
Free with entry ticket (adults and children £10, 1-year-olds £5, under-1s free)
Age guidance: 0–8

London Short Film Festival: Can You Imagine A World? (+ filmmakers intro) (PG)
Sunday 25 January, 14:20
The Garden Cinema, 39-41 Parker Street, WC2B 5PQ
£15 per person
Age guidance: 7+

Family Art Day: Discover, Play and Share
Sunday 25 January, 10:–12:00
Estorick Collection of Modern Italian Art, 39a Canonbury Square, N1 2AN
Adults £9.50, under-12s free

Story Festival
Saturday 24 January, 11:00–15:00
Young V&A, Cambridge Heath Road, E2 9PA
FREE
Age guidance: suitable for all

Winter Lights 2026
Until 31 January, 17:00–22:00
Throughout Canary Wharf
FREE

London Art Fair
Saturday 11:00–19:00, Sunday 11:00–17:00
Business Design Centre, Islington, N1 0QH
Adults £27, under-14s free

Snow White, Rose Red, Brown Bear
Saturday 24 January, 11:00 and 14:00
Half Moon Young People’s Theatre, 43 White Horse Road, London E1 0ND
£9 per person
Age guidance: 4+

REPLAY: A Limitless Recycled Playground (see my write-up here)
Saturday and Sunday, various slots throughout the day (and daily until 12 April)
Southbank Centre, Belvedere Road, SE1 8XX
£7.50 per person
Age guidance: different sessions for 6 months–3 years and 4–11 years (younger children can join older siblings in the older session if necessary)

Dirty Looks: Desire and Decay in Fashion (see my write-up here)
Until 25 January
Barbican Centre, Silk Street, EC2Y 8DS
Adults £10, under-16s free

Squirrel
Until 22 February, various times
Unicorn Theatre, 147 Tooley Street, SE1 2HZ
Adult + child £25, extra child £12.50
Age guidance: 6 months–4 years

Walthamstow Curling Lounge (see my write-up here)
Thursday–Sunday throughout winter
Big Penny Social, 1 Priestley Way, E17 6AL
Adults £10, children £7 (per hour)
Age guidance: 5+ (note: you can book evening slots too, but children are only allowed in the venue until 18:00)

Superhero City Adventure for Kids in Kensington Gardens (see my write-up here)
Available all days and times (it’s self-guided) throughout the season
£6 per group
Europe sculpture, Albert Memorial, Kensington Gardens, SW7 2ET
Age guidance: 4–8

Taylor Wessing Photo Portrait Prize 2025
Until 8 February, 10:30–18:00 (until 21:00 on Fridays and Saturdays)
National Portrait Gallery, St Martin's Place, WC2H 0HE
Adults £9.50, 12–18s £4.75, under-12s free

Harland Miller at the Design Museum (see my write-up here)
Until 25 January (Friday–Sunday, 10:00–18:00; Monday–Thursday 10:00–17:00)
Design Museum, 224–238 Kensington High Street, W8 6AG
FREE

Grinchmas Afternoon Tea Sightseeing Bus Tour (see my write-up here)
Daily until 31 January, various time slots
Departs from Victoria Coach Station, 164 Buckingham Palace Road, SW1W 9TP
Adults £52, children £47
Age guidance: 5+

Me (see my write-up here)
Until 25 January (various dates and start times)
Little Angel Theatre, 14 Dagmar Passage, N1 2DN
Adults £17, children £15
Age guidance: 2–5

Room on the Broom + Zog and the Flying Doctors (U): Family Film Club
Saturday 24 January, 11:00
Barbican Centre, Silk Street, EC2Y 8DS
Adults £5, children £2.50
Age guidance: 3+
NEARLY SOLD OUT